Stories we need to Feel

the stories we tell, to avoid stories we must feel

As I began to formulate my foggy thoughts about the upcoming full moon, I felt resistance building up around wanting to be honest about the sign of Pisces.

This provided the gift of awareness that I must.

The thing is, there are a lot of roses are red, violets are blue interpretations of the sign. Like many narratives around, well, everything in life, we tend to stuff down the bits that aren’t easily slid into the systemically asserted “good” category.

But the astrological archetypes aren’t polarized in their value. The divinity embedded in planetary & sign myth isn’t solely good or bad. There are a myriad of ways in which archetypes manifest, which is proof that life exists within them.

Where you shut down to a certain potential is where a lot of un-lived life exists.

Every time you deny possible manifestations that don’t align with your want for a certain way of feeling, you add another piece of life to the Typhon. Two more heads pop up.

It’s truly amazing what we humans can create.

Eventually it’s impossible to contain the contents of such a denial. The fireworks aren’t sparkly celebrations — you realize they are in fact, bombs. You just told yourself a story about what had been occurring, so you felt you could tolerate the experience.

The astrological moon holds the craters of earlier and unknown experiences.

Other people can see the impact on us pretty easily, but we don’t necessarily have a strong relationship with awareness regarding the emotional repercussions of such hits. So the events tend to own us.

We do things day to day, in loyalty to an impact from long ago. We re-spond to life from a certain place.

When the full moon is eclipsed in Pisces, we may feel especially unsettled, sensing what could happen in order to teach us more & more of what the craters speak to, & how they have been controlling our minds, day to day.

We are also more intensely enmeshed in the time polarity — how past, present & future are an eye-blink away. The events happening now are connected with bone wisdom, which knows something about our future. Current identification with events feeds a certain outcome, one beyond what we’ve been conditioned to see. Talk about a masterclass in control issues.

What the moon holds — the memory that lives within it — is not all of a rosy hued sentiment.

When the moon is at perigee & closest to the earth — or as it is often expressed in mainstream narratives, a super moon — the threat of the ourorbouric waters taking us back, forcibly removing the boundary we’ve created between us and truth-beyond-the-veil is strong.

The potential of merging with the contents of unlimited stories about our existence — in human form & “somewhere, out there” — can occur, beyond our conscious control.

So we may try to use universal wisdom to our advantage, to create the feeling that we can contain the unveiling. But where we get schooled is when we try to use it in ways that cross the boundaries of others & ourselves.

Experiences & events that are not for us to interfere with, or try to explore, yet we do anyway — consciously or unconsciously. Time makes promises when we do this.

And we do tend to do this unconsciously. I’ve had enough micro health issues to know we can merge with another human being and take on their illness, without realizing we are doing so. So much information can be shared in this way. This is the danger of medical intuition if you don’t know how to unbind yourself from another persons story.

We also do it consciously to avoid a truth about how we’ve contributed to the destructive elements of earthly life we desperately want to be cleansed of. If you want to change your role, you have to know what role you’ve cast yourself in. It is for you to explore your potential to do this.

Pisces is famous for boundary crossing, and painting the cross a certain hue. Destroyer, victim or savior are 3 potentials that can activate in response to the chaos that ensues when we cross boundaries. This does not mean the sign is bad or wrong — it’s an energy that is trying to use feeling to make its way through life.

Yet, there is a ton of feeling in this world & beyond it. It’s extreme in scope. The indoctrinated denial of that reality makes it harder to exist in a watery way.

If no one wants to hold their own feelings about the potentials, where does all of it go? Into the watery ether, where the watery boys & girls feel into it, and are affected by it, for better or worse.

This is why we tend to deny reality in the Pisces areas of our lives: our fear of being dissolved by unimaginable degrees of feeling is profound.

We default and prefer to refuse exploring the potential of feeling. We’ll use the imaginal function to tell another story about “WHY” — why our family experience went that way, why our finances aren’t functioning the way we’d like them to; why our relationships keep ending up at a brick wall; why our health is never quite what we feel we need it to be; why someone wasn’t behaving the way we wanted them to.

We use stories & imaginal realms to tolerate feeling. We want to be able to control the volume of life.

We can tether ourselves to life with little or big lies in the Pisces area of our life.

Eventually, life de-veils us. Our consciousness is invaded, and we do what we do to survive it — we try to flee from the typhon.

• We might absolve ourselves of day to day necessities, refusing to integrate with life
• We might become phobic of the world, and face every experience with romanticized ideals of its potentials
• We might strive for dominion over others, using control mechanisms to compensate for feeling so intensely vulnerable to the realms of emotion
• We might dissociate from our rage at feeling out of control, and unconsciously antagonize others, so that “they” can hold the frustration we feel — “whatever do you mean, dear? I’m not angry.”

When we feel psychically flooded & invaded by a life experience that conflicts with our want to reunite with eternal love — the power of our creative potential, as humans, to unite heart, mind and feeling — we do certain things.

Perhaps recently, in the days leading up to a Pisces Super Moon Eclipse, you’ve had an experience that’s surprised you in its disturbing nature — you tilted your head at the lengths humans will go, to refuse returning to feeling.

Maybe you’d like to spend some time writing, contemplating the following:

• How do we contort reality to serve our comfort?
• What do we use to avoid returning to ourorboric waters, where everything is potential, and nothing is form?
• How do we misuse forces of universal powers to skip over integrating the chaotic nature of day-to-day experiences, like relationships, work, money, health?
• Where are we not honoring another person’s free will? How are we violating our own boundaries? Are we aware of the repercussions of such acts? (the body tells us when this is occurring).
• What role do we tend to play the most: victim, rescuer or perpetrator?
• What role do others tend to try to make us play for them the most: victim, rescuer or perpetrator?
• What stories do we tell to avoid the stories we need to feel?
• And how do we bring ourselves back to knowing the unlimited potential of love, in the face of even the most absurd & psychologically destructive potentials of human denial?

Super moon Lunar Eclipse in Pisces — 25 degrees of Pisces

Tuesday September 17, 2024 at 7:33:22 AM PST (British Columbia, Canada)

Tuesday September 17 2024 at 4:33 PM CEST (Berlin, Germany)

Wednesday September 18, 2024 at 12:33 AM AEST (Sydney, Australia)

Andrea Scoretz is a writer, astrologer & renegade theologian. She posts most of her thoughts on her website, MustLoveCrows.com