Healing the Individual Spark
Musings on the Aquarius Leo polarity
The Aquarius & Leo polarity is kinda intense. Some astrologers say it’s a trauma signature. I feel there’s space to consider what could have occurred, while not allowing for finality in our interpretations. The finality we assign our experiences & perceptions creates blockages in our awareness.
Curiosity is the rightful heir of the throne. ‘Cuz there’s always the issue of right brained thinking to contend with, wanting to assign meaning to everything we feel. There’s definitely a detached logic vs emotion & inner spark going on with the signs of Aquarius & Leo — right brained vs left brained.
A good example can be discovered through remote viewing. One sees an image, but their interpretation of said image is not always correct. Our analytical minds — right brained thinking — rely on interpreting what we pick up on in order to make sense of what we see. It does this in an attempt to feel safe. Unknown bad, must analyze — this is the mind, and it will construct narratives based on the feelings we have about those images. Archaically, it does this to protect us from certain levels of awareness & feelings.
An objective view requires some sort of shunning of feeling. This is ok strategically, particularly when there is a highly charged conversation or situation at hand and screaming simply won’t do. But one still needs to be with the feeling nature at some point, or else the vessel — the human body & mind — malfunctions.
Those feelings have to go somewhere. And they do. They don’t leave. They take up residence in the body & propel certain behaviours and actions from the depths of wherever they have taken up shop. It’s energy that will be put somewhere if it’s not allowed to express in the ways it wants to, in the moment. And it will live, thrive and reproduce.
This is why energetic housekeeping & hygiene is so important.
I was at the beach yesterday and saw a fly fighting for its life in the ocean. Upon further inspection, I realized it wasn’t a wasp, so I picked it up. It crawled up my arm, and when I placed it safely on a rock, clear of its near death vehicle, it ran around a little bit, then convulsed. It shook & tremored on the shoreline for a few seconds, and then went on its way.
This is a fly dealing with the energy of almost having its creative life force taken out, by way of almost meeting its fly maker.
When I think of the Leo & Aquarius polarity, I think we feel close to death when we are not allowed to creatively express ourselves — our natural state or essence. And the almost death of our inner creative self often gets funnelled into trying to be seen in the world in a position of authority, or notoriety, often for a cause or some idealized outcome. Underneath the unwavering focus to be seen “out there” as rational, is a need to have our own almost death rattle on the shoreline, to compensate for things that happened long ago.
I mention shoreline because it’s about figuring out how to work with feelings we weren’t in a space to feel safe enough to feel way back when. Now as adults, we wonder where intolerance of certain feelings comes from, & the anger that comes online within us when we aren’t seen the way we want to be seen, or don’t achieve what we think we ought to.
Well, it’s totally appropriate to feel intense anger when someone tried to drown your creative self. And that energy lives within you — rightly so.
Many of the most assertive people who are driven to be seen in the world as an authority figure are doing it to compensate for something. And when I see this full moon in Aquarius coming, I think dang, we need to honour the creative, expressive nature within us, and give that energy room to play, to compensate for the moments the spark within us was dampened by someone else’s issues.
We need to contemplate why we desire to be seen, and what it’s compensating for.
When we do this work, we can show up in the world authentically — the essence of our creative spark can serve humanity. We can then be relieved of being unconsciously fuelled by a fragmented need to convince someone else we aren’t bad or wrong, or catering to someone else’s discomfort with our essence, which convinced us we weren’t ok being ourselves.
It’s accessing & offering our essence, to serve the greater good. You can’t take the individual out of the equation. A society is made up of them. Best to work on healing the individual spark — relighting it. This upcoming full moon in Aquarius can offer us clues and cues on how to help that along.
Full Moon in Aquarius — August 1 2023, 11:30 AM PST — 9 degrees of Aquarius
Become aware of your energetics & you’ll trip over yourself less often